The World Series starts today!!! I am extremely torn this year seeing as I am both a Rangers and Cardinals fan. If you don't know what the World Series is, know of any Ranger besides Walker Texas or maybe the Lone, and are tempted to stop reading, don't! This article is for you! (For my avid sports-watching television-screaming readers, you'll enjoy this too. Feel free to laugh at my insightful advice.)
DISCLAIMER: I am by no means an expert on any topic I choose to write about from here on out, but maybe the things that I've gone through or are going through currently relate to you and can help you in some way. At the very least, you can laugh at/with me, remembering that one time that maybe you too felt like a complete moron, as I go through the many Mishaps of an Almost Adult.
Who has ever felt lost in a conversation about sports? How many times have the men (or maybe it was me) in your life gone off on a tangent about some sports related topic that you’ve had zero idea what they’re talking about and automatically tune out, wondering instead why squirrels don’t get fat? I know of a handful of you who this applies to right off the bat. (I rhymed.)
This is my absolute favorite time of year. Yes, the weather is finally cooling off. The leaves are changing in other states besides Texas. Here they just fall off. I just had a birthday. The Holidays are right around the corner. But I’m not talking about any of those things. I’m talking about Baseball Playoff Season, College Football Season and the start of Hockey Season. I am infatuated with all three.
For those of you who don’t know me, you’d probably never guess that I am a database for a ridiculous amount of useless sports knowledge, I have my own shotgun, I own all 22 James Bond movies, I scream at the TV while watching sports, I am a relatively good fly fisher, skier, and cycler, and I can more than likely tell you the make and model of a car by the headlights. I also apparently spent too much time with my older brother growing up. (Buddies forever, Eric.)
If you didn’t grow up with an older brother, parents who were crazed fans, or any interest in athletics at all, sports can be a hard thing to take an interest in. It’s daunting and downright boring to watch an entire game without having a single clue as to what’s going on. For women, we ask questions, and sometimes dumb ones, about things we don’t understand. (I didn't think buffaloes had wings?) Without meaning to, this breaks the first and foremost rule of watching sports with dudes. NO TALKING. Especially about things that are unrelated to the game at hand.
DISCLAIMER: I am by no means an expert on any topic I choose to write about from here on out, but maybe the things that I've gone through or are going through currently relate to you and can help you in some way. At the very least, you can laugh at/with me, remembering that one time that maybe you too felt like a complete moron, as I go through the many Mishaps of an Almost Adult.
Who has ever felt lost in a conversation about sports? How many times have the men (or maybe it was me) in your life gone off on a tangent about some sports related topic that you’ve had zero idea what they’re talking about and automatically tune out, wondering instead why squirrels don’t get fat? I know of a handful of you who this applies to right off the bat. (I rhymed.)
This is my absolute favorite time of year. Yes, the weather is finally cooling off. The leaves are changing in other states besides Texas. Here they just fall off. I just had a birthday. The Holidays are right around the corner. But I’m not talking about any of those things. I’m talking about Baseball Playoff Season, College Football Season and the start of Hockey Season. I am infatuated with all three.
For those of you who don’t know me, you’d probably never guess that I am a database for a ridiculous amount of useless sports knowledge, I have my own shotgun, I own all 22 James Bond movies, I scream at the TV while watching sports, I am a relatively good fly fisher, skier, and cycler, and I can more than likely tell you the make and model of a car by the headlights. I also apparently spent too much time with my older brother growing up. (Buddies forever, Eric.)
If you didn’t grow up with an older brother, parents who were crazed fans, or any interest in athletics at all, sports can be a hard thing to take an interest in. It’s daunting and downright boring to watch an entire game without having a single clue as to what’s going on. For women, we ask questions, and sometimes dumb ones, about things we don’t understand. (I didn't think buffaloes had wings?) Without meaning to, this breaks the first and foremost rule of watching sports with dudes. NO TALKING. Especially about things that are unrelated to the game at hand.
Well, that's where I come in. Since I can't personally sit with all of you and explain the rules and happenings of sporting events, I'm giving you guidance and rules to follow so that you won't have time to wonder if its all the cardio that squirrels do that keeps them so fit.
- So you want to be a fan! First off, pick a sport you want to follow. Which seems least boring? Which has the cutest players? (Generally not hockey, they take a lot of sticks and pucks to the face and teeth. Sorry hockey boys, I still love you.) Now, this is key, pick a team. If you have a local team, go for that. So now you are not only a (insert sport here) fan, but a (insert team here) fan. You can even pick a favorite player. BE BRAVE! Pick one that isn't everyone's favorite. Learn a few stats about him or her and you'll really impress people when they ask you who your favorite is. EXAMPLE: My favorite St Louis Cardinals player is Yadier Molina. He's the youngest of the Catching Molina Brothers and has won the Golden Glove Award. He hits better in the Post-Season and his ability to pick people off bases from home plate makes him fan-FREAKIN'-tabulous. (See? It sounds like I know what the heck I'm talking about and that's just about one player. I could have read a Wikipedia article about him and gotten all of that info in the summary.)
- Dress in your teams colors. You don't have to go out and buy gear that says your team's name plastered across your chest, but always check to make sure you aren't accidentally wearing the opposing teams colors. Its poor form to be wearing blue and red to a TCU-SMU game. GO FROGS!
- The key to looking like a sports fan is your participation in the game. Lean forward in your seat, cheer with the crowd, bite your nails a little and insert random state-the-obvious yells at the players. Repetition works wonders here. "Go! GO!"
- High five the people around you that are also rooting for the same team as you. Get involved! Be excited!
- If you have an iPhone, download ESPN Score Center. You can set it up to have alerts as to what your team's final score of the game was, so you'll always sound prepared even if you didn't watch the game. (EXAMPLE: Man, I can't believe I missed last night's game... The Rangers STOMPED the Tigers! 15-5? Geez Louise!) You sound like a pro!
- I haven't convinced you, you still don't want to be a fan. Live games are fun no matter what the sport or team. Pick a team, figure out how they score (be aware of switching ends at breaks in the game...) and keep drinking heavily. Cheer with the crowd! Enjoy the company!
- Have fun! Sports are supposed to be entertainment, so consider yourself entertained.
If you need me, I'll be sitting on my couch, leaning forward, biting my nails, screaming at the TV for the next week or so. GO RANG-INALS!
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